The weather is taking its toll. It’s been cold and snowy for weeks with just a hint of sunshine. All that grey can mess with you. Like now…I’m sitting here writing at 3:46 am when I know I have to be up in 3 hours and face another few inches of snow, single digit temps and a hairy ride to work. I’m tired of it. I’ve talked myself into allowing Kathy and I to look to somewhere warmer during the winter months. We can’t afford it…but I’m mentally prepared anyway.
I hate it when you reach that time in life through circumstance or depression…maybe exasperation… when you look at the glass that always used to appear half-full and wonder if it’s really half-empty after all. I was at that crossroad tonight for about an hour.
What if God never makes it any easier? What if there never is quite enough? What if life doesn’t work out the way you planned and you can’t see your way clear to get to where you want to be? What if people…family…let you down? What if your body lets you down? What if panic attacks debilitate you? What if you’re way past the platitudes that some Christians offer when you’re in your darkest moments? Here’s the kicker…why do we expect that we won’t have to deal with this kind of stuff. What makes us think that just because we’re saved we’re not going to suffer…maybe suffer a lot… 1 Peter 4:12-13
1 Peter 4:12-13 New International Version (NIV)
Suffering for Being a Christian
12 Dear friends, do not be surprised at the fiery ordeal that has come on youto test you, as though something strange were happening to you. 13 But rejoice inasmuch as you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed.
I have learned to look for God’s blessing in the small things…and celebrate that fact that He loves me and cares for me even when life is uncomfortable…even painful.
A few days ago I was napping in my favorite chair…I was in that sleep state where I was nearly conscious but didn’t want to be. Anyway, as Kathy was passing by she kissed me on the forehead…and kissed me again on her way back. It wasn’t a long, lingering passionate smooch…but I felt it nonetheless. I knew it was her and in that moment I felt loved by my wife in a special way.
Blessings…any blessings… are like a kiss from God for the believer. A way to feel his presence, his provision and providence. Someone once told me that blessing never precedes obedience. If that’s true…then I ought to check my life even in the trials…because I always want to be in a position to be blessed. I want God to see a life that honors him regardless of circumstance.